- 5.
“Amy.”
John looked at me for a long time, his eyes
reddened, his voice hoarse after a long
silence.
I glanced at him, my earlier joy evaporating,
“What are you doing here?” I asked coldly.
John seemed at a loss for words, taken aback
by my icy demeanor. “To find you,” he
mumbled after a moment.
“If I remember correctly, we’re done.” I
couldn’t even bring myself to look at him. I
couldn’t understand this sudden shift in his
usually cold personality.
Why would he travel so far to find me?
John pulled a sealed envelope from his bag
and pressed it into my hand. “This is your
‘Employee of the Month‘ medal and the
bonus. Mr. Jones asked me to give them to
you.”
I felt the circular medal, a pang of sadness
hitting me.
く
In my past life, I had cried over losing this
award. John had bought me a cheap imitation
to appease me.
I had been so happy then, thinking he cared
enough to buy me a replacement.
I hadn’t realized it was just his guilt talking,
trying to make up for sabotaging me.
I took the envelope, glancing at him
indifferently. “If there’s nothing else, I’m going
home.”
I’d barely taken a step when John grabbed my
wrist, stopping me.
I looked down at his hand, the irony not lost
on me. “This is a public place,” I reminded
him. “Aren’t you afraid of tarnishing your
image as a teacher by grabbing me like this?”
John stiffened, but didn’t let go. After a long
pause, he said in a muffled voice, “There’s
something else. I’m taking you home.”
I stared at him, incredulous. “What?” I asked,
a bitter laugh escaping my lips. “Are you
taking me back so Sarah can gloat over not
getting the award?”
It was his usual tactic, in both this life and the
last. Give a little, then take it all away.
A constant reminder that his sudden acts of
kindness always had an ulterior motive, and
that motive was always Sarah.
John pulled my arm, and I stumbled against
L
him.
It was our first embrace. His arms tightened
around my waist. His voice trembled. “I know I
was wrong. I’ve been reflecting on my
mistakes. I haven’t been attentive enough to
you. I’ll change. Come home with me, okay?”
It was the closest he would ever come to
begging.
But my heart was still. I pushed him away.
John’s face was a mixture of confusion,
bewilderment, and anger. “I’m humbling
myself here. Stop being stubborn! What do
you want from me?”
That was when I saw it clearly. He hadn’t
changed at all.
く
His earlier kindness was a facade. He would
always be the one holding the power, wielding
his perceived love as a weapon.
When I didn’t respond to his overtures, his
impatience flared.
I met his anger with calm indifference. “John,”
I asked, “you came looking for me, and now
you think you’ve been humble enough. Don’t
you find that ridiculous?”
John’s face darkened, but he softened his
tone. “Fine, I was wrong. I shouldn’t have
raised my voice.”
“I’ve been so worried. You haven’t been home
for a month. If Chloe hadn’t left her husband
and tracked you down, I wouldn’t have known
Г
He stared at me, searching my face, as if
looking for some hidden emotion.
What did he expect to see? Surprise? Relief?
Excitement? Did he think a few kind words
would make me go back with him?
Never.
I looked away, noticing Chloe dealing with her
own unwanted visitor with equal impatience.
“How many times do I have to say it? We’re
done.”
Losing my patience, I pulled away from John
and went inside, locking the door behind me.
John continued knocking, his voice pleading.
“Amy. I was wrong. Come out. let’s talk ”
く
Moments later, my neighbor yelled, “Stop
banging on the door! She doesn’t want to see
you! You’re disturbing my kids‘ homework!”
