Chapter 2 Gift
From the day we got married, I could sense that Jonathan had someone else in his
heart.
There seemed to be a barrier between us.
Everyone said he loved me and was very good to me.
He was a rare good man.
But I always felt that he was using me to make up for his sorry feelings for another
person.
He made me grow my hair long and wear long skirts which I never wore.
I even wore high heels.
He even bought me makeup that I never
used.
He just wanted to mold me into someone
else.
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Only after I dressed up as he asked would he show me a loving look, take my hand, and say softly, “I will always love you and we will never be apart again.”
I looked at his eyes full of possessiveness and persistence, and listened to his loving words, but I felt disappointed.
I didn’t tell him that I had seen the pictures he had locked away.
The woman in those photos with long hair and makeup was very similar to me.
But I didn’t expose him but acted with him.
Because I loved him and was afraid of losing him.
But I went against his ideas more and more often and wanted to be myself more and
more.
I hoped he would get used to my personality and fall in love with the real
- me.
He was slightly annoyed at first, but he
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bore it as long as he saw my face.
The relationship between us grew better and better until Kristina returned after I
gave birth to Jimmy.
The beautiful love that I had worked so
hard for was easily shattered by her.
Right after I gave birth to Jimmy, Jonathan took Jimmy to Kristina’s place every day.
The two of them took care of Jimmy’s daily life together.
I laid in the hospital with no one paying attention to me.
As a result, I suffered from postpartum depression.
When Jonathan came to visit me, I put the diagnosis in front of him.
I begged him, trying to reawaken his love for me.
But he just looked at me coldly.
“Catherine, stop acting.
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“I only asked Kristina to help take care of the child, why do you have to act like this?
“Since you have mental problems, then let Kristina take care of Jimmy from now on. You are not capable to be a mother.”
After saying this, he ignored my pleas, pulled away my hand that was holding his arm, and left the ward with a cold face.
The tumor in my lower abdomen suddenly started to hurt so much that my forehead sweated.
I used my last bit of strength, crawled onto the bed, and lay down.
I wanted to close my eyes and rest, but all I could see were scenes of me and Jonathan together.
It was like looking back on my life.
I lay flat on the bed, wriggling my body laboriously like a silkworm pupa.
I took off that cheap skirt.
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The pain made me curl up involuntarily, and my skirt was pushed to the ground.
My sweat soaked the quilt, but I didn’t bother to wipe it.
The doctor was right.
I couldn’t hold on any longer.
I closed my eyes gently, but the laughter in the living room continued to reach my
ears.
Jonathan said to Jimmy, “Show Kristina the gift you picked.”
Then, there was the sound of cartons being rummaged.
Kristina covered her mouth in surprise and said with emotion, “Jimmy, how did you know that I like this necklace? Is it because you and I have a tacit understanding? Our baby is so sensible! I also bought you a gift!”
“Surprise!”
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Jimmy couldn’t hide his emotions and immediately screamed, “Superman! And Transformers!”
“Even my dad doesn’t buy these for me. You’re the best in the world!”
My breath became weaker and weaker.
Kristina smiled and said, “Jimmy, what gift did your mother give you? Can you show it to me?”
Before Jimmy could speak, Jonathan immediately said coldly.
“Don’t mention her. It took her so long to change her clothes!”
As soon as he finished speaking, he turned around and shouted towards my room, “Have you finished changing your clothes? How long do you want to keep us waiting? Even Jimmy is never late for school, are you not capable as a five–year–old child?”
A bit of bloody taste suddenly overflowed from my throat, but I suppressed it.
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My eyes filled with tears.
In his eyes, was I not even a human being?
Without getting any response, Jonathan lost his patience.
He started to yell angrily, “Why are you dawdling? Do you want the three of us to
wait for you here? Don’t put on makeup. It’s
useless!”
Suddenly, there were irregular footsteps.
outside.
A small figure gently opened the door of
my room.
I knew it was Jimmy, but I no longer had the strength to lift my head.
I also wanted to touch his little face one
ast time and see him smile.
I wanted to hear him call me mom.
Even if he hated me, it didn’t matter.
But Jimmy only took two steps after
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there, he looked disdain.
He said, “Mom is so lazy that she even sleeps on my birthday. She doesn’t love me like Kristina does!”
His voice was clearly heard, and Jonathan immediately came in angrily.
Seeing the skirt that I pushed to the ground, he suddenly frowned and looked
angry.
“Why did you throw the skirt? Is it necessary? Why didn’t you throw me and Jimmy out together? Catherine, what are you doing? Jimmy and I don’t owe you anything!”
“Are you sure you want to cause trouble on Jimmy’s fifth birthday? Then just sleep here
and wait to die! Kristina and I can also make Jimmy happy today!”
I didn’t have the strength to reply but could only sob.
I was wrapped in a quilt, and he kicked me
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impatiently with his leather shoes.
“Are you pretending to be dead? Can’t you hear me? Jimmy has been calling you. Who did you ignore him?
“Look at you, how can you be a mother? I was blind to marry you!”
After he finished speaking, seeing that I still didn’t respond, he slammed the door.
I couldn’t hear or see anything.
Then, he and Kristina took Jimmy, carrying the snacks and yogurt, and walked out of the room as intimately as a family.
As the door closed, I closed my eyes forever.
At the last moment, I thought, “If I hadn’t been so persistent at the beginning, would I not have to come to this point?”
